Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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