I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
