this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
