the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Randomize
