Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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