she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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