You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
