If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
