once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
My vagina just recognized that song.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
