Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
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