porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
