So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I look excited, but its just a facade.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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