Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
