so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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