you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
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