NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
