Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
