I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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