Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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