What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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