The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
