I think my vagina is haunted
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
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