Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
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