I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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