I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize
