im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Randomize
