She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
that may or may not have been my penis.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
