is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
