Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
Randomize
