I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
