I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
