Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
