I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
