i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Randomize
