I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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