**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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