Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
OPIZZABONMYDICK
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
