at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
