Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
