Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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