Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize