if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Randomize
