Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
If I die, sorry about rent.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I wear drunk well.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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