good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
