This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
