I didn't shave. On purpose
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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