the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
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