CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
