Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Randomize
