Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
